Mom's Advice: Get It done Son!


Mom's!

This pandemic has taught me so much about people.  More important, it has taught me so much about myself. 

 Now living in this new world, I keep reflecting back on some of the biggest lessons I have learned.  My biggest support and foundation going through tough times has been my mother(s).  

 If you take a close look at the photos's I have used in the blog, there is a woman in the ocean just behind the young boy.  This beautiful brave person is his mother.  She took him out into the surf of one of the most aggressive surfing breaks on Maui.  She swam him out into the surf.  Always the protector.  The Momma Bear.  She gave him a safe space to go after his dream to surf.  She let go!  She set him free!

 It reminded how many times my mother did that for me.  She was always in the back ground.  She was willing to watch me go after my dreams.  Willing to let me fail.  Always ready to be there as the lifeguard  if I started to drown.  

 Before I get too far,  I need to give some background.  You see,  I have 4 mothers.  All have been there for me as the seasons of my life change.  

 I am adopted.  Giving me a birth mother (who is now back in my life).  My mother Anne, raised me.  My parents divorced.  Dad re-marries.  Bringing  Diane into my life.  When  my parents where going through their divorce, Barb stepped in.  She made my sister and I apart of her tribe.  My mom would say my middle name should be "Jones".  

 Barb made us apart of her life. During this rough time we spent a lot of time on her  ranch in St George. Barb's son (all of her kids) and I have been friends/brothers for over 48 years.  When my mother  died, Barb reminded me I am family.

 So when times get rough I have 4 Strong Beautiful Awesome Women in my life!

 During my first semester at college I hit a rough spot.  I ended up leaving just before finals.  Moving back to Salt Lake.  Starting an auto detailing business.  I had just ended a relationship.  I was lost!  

 Late one night I get this phone call.  It's my Mom.  "You are getting on a plane to New Mexico this weekend to come see me".  "I am?".  "Yep!" 

 So off I went.  After I landed I was quickly informed I was going dancing with her and all of her teaching friends.  We hit the Talk of the Town Saloon in Gallop New Mexico.  Here I am 19 year old kid spending  the night drinking beer, dancing a with my mom, her friends and a fun group of intoxicated locals!  What an experience  in life!

 We had a long drive back to her place on the Navajo Reservation.    She asked me how it was gong and just let me spill my guts.  Lots of tears of pain, rejection, fear and self doubt.   She just listened.

 The next morning we are sitting on her patio having coffee.  She leans over to me and says Your plane leave this afternoon".  She then said "You are going to go see your father tomorrow.  You are going to explain how you made a mistake leaving school.  You are going to ask for his help.  You are going back to St George.  Barb is there.  She will watch over you. You have a support system there.  You will get a job and earn your own way.  I called grandpa and he will be near by if you need him".  

 I questioned her plan.  She then gave me insight and the very best advice ever!  

 She said "John, look at all of the men in our family. The Men in your Life!  Your father John, my brothers, your fathers brothers. Jim (Barb's husband). Diane's Brothers.   I know one day you will meet your birth family.  I have no doubt you will find out your birth father(Tom)/mother and the men in your blood line are just as kick ass, strong and great men!  All of them Winners!  You are a WINNER!" (she was 100% right on all accounts).  

"Today is the day" she said.  Then she hit me hard and said: "You are going to put your Balls between your legs and become a Man! It's time to kick some ASS!".   
(anyone who knew my mother knows she loved to go for the shock value)

 She then went on to say you can do and achieve anything you put your mind to!  

 What I have now come to realize is she was teaching me stoicism.  Your fear awakes you!  You did not choose to be afraid.   However, what you do chose is how you react or more importantly,  HOW YOU ACT!

 Over these past weeks I have seen so many people who I had respect for, react out of fear.  Reacting and acting poorly. Sending negative energy and "poor me" attitude on all sides.  Sending blame.  Forgetting they need to work the problem.  Solve it.  Face the change!  Embrace change!  It's time to Kick ASS. 

 I am so blessed to have MOM! All of them!  During this time I have found mentors as well.  Men and Women facing the problems head on. Creating solutions.  Not going on social media and adding fuel to the problem.  Quietly behind the seen solving the problems.  True Hero's!  Yes, with their Balls between their legs!
Let's get it done!  We got this!  My Mom said so!

 Have a great day my Friends!
Hooyah!





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